Welcome to the first edition of La Basura Mañanera!

your roundup of the most striking Mexican news you probably don’t crave, all in one place every morning if I have the mental fortitude to read them the night before. Here are the important stories you need to know.

Insert witty quote here.
Photo: Animal Politico

First bag: If the flag goes to shit next year it’s a hat trick!: 

During Flag Day ceremonies,the army failed to put up the flag the right way up. After realizing this they pulled it down, did a badly coordinated switch, and up it went; correctly. Last year’s Flag Day saw our flag be destroyed by high winds.

The President had some remarks to say that sounded more like what a toddler would say to a news crew camera:

“I have been informed that the monumental flag, it has been removed because it was misplaced, not placed correctly, justly the wrong way up, but in the end we’re in this splendid scenario with many flags.... and it doesn’t matter if they’re the right or the wrong way, upwards or downwards”

-President of Mexico, Enrique Peña Nieto


This would be all fine and good, except that an upside down flag is symbolism for, alike the US, distress for the nation. There is precedent to this as some ten military bases put up the flag upside down on orders of the CO after the gas hike. Our President has an estranged relationship with the army, an organization whose importance in the drug wars declined sharply, as the current administration prefers to terrorize citizens and torture suspects carry out law enforcement operations with the Navy. If you wonder why he seemed so inarticulate, I bet he thought a coup was about to happen and the presidential pants got to see some presidential shit.

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Second bag: A literal Mexican standoff inside the National Autonomous University:

With its 40 billion peso a year budget, UNAM chooses to buy imported buses from Germany because they like being wasteful and different to the rest of us for the sake of being different.

In a story that would seem only El Deforma could’ve procured, two drug dealers shot and killed each other outside one of UNAM’s faculty buildings this friday. UNAM has been increasing security measures inside campus to stop the sale of drugs within it’s perimeter, as more patrols took place and more public lighting was installed within the campus, these drug dealers were pushed into a single place. UNAM’s Dean indicated that this was unacceptable and that more measures will be taking place.

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UNAM and the rest of the country are at odds always, and as such it operates as a small bubble of its own with its own security force, ambulance team, and 400,000USD imported public transportation buses. This all means that the Dean might be able to actually do something about this, as he reflects about it aboard that imported Merc bus.

Cue all the stereotypes of their drugged out hippie students that live in a bubble of their own in 3...2...1....

Third bag: El Presidente says: Oh hells nawh!:

These two idiots have something in common, and it’s not the obsession with the hair...

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According to The Washington Post, President Enrique Peña Nieto( a man currently as popular as Bill Cosby) had to cancel a meeting with President Donald Trump(a man currently confused as to why Mexicans dislike him) because Trump became jealous of Enrique’s flowing hair did not confirm to the media that the Mexican state would not pay for his border wall.

The meeting that was brokered on Valentine’s day by Secretary of Foreign Relations, Luis Videgaray Caso (a man currently confused as to why he ended up as Chancellor in the first place), went the way of many previous supposed meetings between the two leaders: We agree to meet, Trump spouts bullshit, we back down. The cycle is completed!

Fourth bag: Los Gringos dicen: Ni mergas!:

*ASF laughs safely from the other side of town*

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The F.B.I. has, once again, declined to participate on the investigation into the illegal use of espionage software Pegasus targeted at journalists, academics, lawyers, and activists by PGR.

Pegasus was purchased by the Attorney General’s office, PGR (by its spanish acronym), and used accordingly. Incidentally, PGR is probably behind this investigation.

The F.B.I. declined to participate because it claims that the “very real” investigation is just a coverup for the people involved and it doesn’t want to validate it.

Fifth bag: If you thought baggage fees weren’t enough:

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The National Auditory, ASF (by its Spanish acronym), revealed to the lower chamber of congress that after an investigation into the new Mexico City airport protect it found “irregular and unjustified expenses” for one billion two million pesos.

The report, one of seven, indicated hundreds of mistakes made by countless individuals and companies ranging from contractors all the way to the Secretary of Defense for countless irregular purchases including buying construction material way above market value.

The airport has run into hundreds of issues from environmental concerns, cost concerns, use concerns, and ethics concerns. The airport along with the Mexico City-Toluca high speed train are supposedly Peña’s legacy infrastructure projects, though shamefully both will probably finish after he steps down in about nine months as his term ends.

Designed by internationally acclaimed architect Norman Foster and some idiot grandson of the Mexican billionaire that “won” the construction contract, Carlos Slim, this airport is supposed to be the best goddamn airport on earth. With a projected capacity to handle hundreds of millions of travelers, further reinforcing the “hub-and-spoke” aviation market Mexico has had for ages, this despite trends having this model challenged. The very young construction company, Carso, has many issues of its own with transparency and an objectively pathetic attempt at gentrifying a section of Mexico City. Listen Carlos, I’m sure you’re smarter than me, but let me tell you something: To gentrify you need to build actual nice buildings! not fucking eyesores!

I bet that the national auditors were happy with their report as they typed it within their very new one billion peso headquarters they built as a “cost saving” and downsizing affair....right.

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I might become an auditor if I get to work in that building.



Recycling: look for similarities.

As we approach election season and these posts focus more and more on the candidates, you will start to see some startling similarities with the American candidates, see if

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That’ll be all for today, wait for the next edition of La Basura Mañanera whenever I have the time to do it again and remember: news without context is nothing but content!