(Possible trigger warning for suicide and depression)
It probably wasn’t ill intentioned but I read a post on oppo that was wondering if Seasonal Affective Disorder(SAD) was real or something people made up and it got to me. I have Depression(MDD) and (SAD) and I said something along the lines of “ I have SAD and Chronic MDD and the SAD makes me feel worse in the winter and if you don’t believe my mental illness is a thing you can fuck off”
Maybe that wasn’t an appropriate response and I should have moved on and ignored it or have been more polite but I’m so tired of it all. It’s hard enough to get through life and manage a mental illness without society minimize it and say it’s not real or your being a little baby for being so weak to let it affect you. With the stigma being so powerful that I have to hide my condition and live in fear of people finding out.
It’s not right, I have a medical condition
and this doesn’t look fake to me. No one questions a cancer patient or tells them they are being weak and should think positively about it. It's taken seriously instead of being seen as a character defect.
I’ve been abused my whole life by my own family who doesn’t like me because I have depression and has told me that I won’t be loved unless I’m more positive and happy, this coupled with depression that I didn’t know how to manage led to my suicide attempt 2 years ago and I thought that made me weak too. I went to our garage and ran the car for 7 minutes while revving it, my research had told me it would take 12 to pass out but something inside stopped me and told me to try another day. I found this
And it helped me to realize that despite what society and my own family had engrained in me I’m not weak because I live in misery but keep going anyway but I tried to kill myself before I found that out. I worry for those like me who have been affected by the stigma and hope that despite the fear they can find support and the help they need before it’s too late.
Mental illness is real and stigma is hurting some of the people who need the most help and support. I don’t know how to fix it but I’m majoring in public health and want to give it a shot. In the mean time I hope this post can be a stick to someone who needs one because I know I needed one.
(For the mods
I thought about posting this to oppo but wasn’t sure it was appropriate as I am not trying to call anyone out and it’s not really car related. I also tried to leave a trigger warning at the top, thanks)